You’re my White Pony!

Puma "Speedcat" trainers
(aka the only sporty shoes I own)

Sometimes what we’re looking for is staring us right in the face, but it takes a psychic to clue us in to reality. The white stallion isn’t what we’re led to believe he’ll be, so maybe it’s time we stop assuming that love will look like what we expect. Take a second look at the guys who you’ve put in the “friend zone” over the years; you never know, some of them might be worth a second look. Especially if he has really good footwear!   

The One That Got Away

It’s been a year since you ended us. Some people still refer to you as the one who got away, but honestly I still want bitch slap you. I’m over the fact that you left, mostly because I came to the realization that I was worth about 10 of you. I have my life together, I’m going places, and I have more talent in my pinky finger than you’ll ever have. In the long run your choice was good, because you would have held me back from my full potential, and I can’t be with someone who I look down on and don’t respect as an equal. So really, you’re not the one who got away, because that implies that what we had was something worthwhile. It’s pretty obvious that it wasn’t special, and neither were you. Just another frog prince, who I had to kiss to prove that I’m better off on my own. After all, my best friends are my soulmates, and the most important person in my life is me.

OPI "The One That Got Away" nail polish from the Katy Perry Collection.

 

Dirty Love

Just a little hint to my future boyfriends: 

If you're going to write me love letters don't break my heart four days later. 

Singles Awareness Day

Here's to the men that we love,

Here's to the men that love us,

But the men that we love will never love us,

So fuck all the men

Here's to us!

(word)