And Just Like That...

... four years had passed, and ne’er a word was seen on this blog… But that’s all about to change. That’s right, people, this bitch is back! 

Maybe it was binge re-watching Sex and the City for the first time in almost a decade, seeing Carrie Bradshaw put pen to paper (or MacBook, more precisely); maybe it was the coming of true Spring vibes with Taurus season, hard on the heels of a fiery Aries-month of birthday celebration and much reckoning; and maybe it was just time to take a look back, not in anger but in fondness and remembrance. 

This blog has always been a bit on the random side: vacillating sharply from love-lorn gushing over fashion artistry (that I’ll never be able to afford) to scathing critiques of the people and places I despise (which could truthfully be an entire blog unto itself). And thus it shall continue, in the sheer randomness that inspired it from day one until now. How about we blame that on my Gemini Venus, shall we? 

So let’s start with this new chapter with a little redux, because, as Carrie Bradshaw so wisely said “They say nothing lasts forever. Dreams change, trends come and go, but friendships never go out of style.” And what is a blog but a friendship with yourself and with the world - putting it all out there in whatever messy, haphazard, and random form it is, and hoping that the people who get it feel the same, find meaning in your words and creation, and hopefully even in you. 

And that’s where this story starts: on a random Wednesday night in June 2008, when my BFF, A, insisted that we were going to the movies. Looking back, I can’t believe we had the energy to go to a movie that started at 9:55 PM, but we were mere girls of 20 and late night frappucinos still packed a kick back then. Off we went (presumably with our purses loaded with illicit treats, as one does when young a broke) and thus my obsession with Sex and the City was born. From the opening scenes of the streets of New York, to the absolutely overwhelming fashion by the legendary Patricia Fields, from the handsome boyfriends/husbands to the surprisingly hip soundtrack, I was hooked. But it was the girls - Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha - who sold it. No matter how well they were (over)dressed, no matter how perfect their lines and their drama, they felt real. Their heartbreak, their laughter, and most of all their friendship hit the mark. 

Watching the film again (because if you’re going to do a redux, you do the redux right) with A and then starting the series again on my own felt like coming home. Not just because I was back where I started, though that was undoubtedly true as well, but because we were back starting again. 

And that’s where this story leaves off (but even more accurately starts again): with a little bit of nostalgia, and a whole lot of heart.

Could It Be Anybody

Anytime anyone says “friends” my mind immediately pictures the guys from the Inbetweeners mocking Jay  - “Ooh friends” paired with a sarcastic thumbs up - to the point where he turns the tables on them and starts jumping on the guy’s car (screaming “friends” again) just to prove that he’s not friends with the guy. Now, this kind of behaviour has less to do with obvious friendship than overt jealousy, but it completely sums up how weird relationships with friends are. And how territorial we can sometimes get when someone tries to steal our place as bestie!

Think about it for a minute. We meet someone, and somehow we decide that we want to be friends with them. Sometimes this happens by random happenstance (you get paired up to do a project together and find out you like each other), sometimes mutual friends introduce you (Liz this is Jaimie, Jaimie this is Liz, you’re friends now), sometimes they’re holdovers from our childhood (Star Wars club 4eva), or you meet over the internet because of mutual interests (Tumblr is a weird place, full of weird and awesome people). Whatever the cause, you keep talking to each other, you keep hanging out together, and even when they’re annoying you keep coming back for more. 

Lately there’s been a lot of talk about how as we get older it becomes more difficult to make new friends, and while I won’t disagree with that, I find the fact that we self-select more and are less willing to put up with poor behaviour to be an interesting phenomenon. I don’t mean becoming more bitter and jaded (we’re already that), but that we’re more able to recognize when people are genuinely good friends, even past their inevitable foibles. 

For me, this comes down to simple behavioural patterns. 

The friend who consistently makes plans, but cancels them equally as consistently; the friend who complains about their partner to your face, and then sends you the “you look hot” text after leaving your company; the friend who ditches you when they start dating someone; the friend who only stays in contact when you live in the same place, even with the advantages of social media - those aren’t particularly good friends. Sometimes they’re downright bad friends, when the behaviour becomes systematic.

The friend who remembers your best friend’s name (and asks how it’s pronounced) even though they’ve never met; the friend who plots world domination with you, even though you’re both too lazy to follow through; the weird friend, who owns their weirdness and encourages yours; the friend who you don’t talk to often, but who makes a point of being supportive when you do; the friend who tells you all their horror stories, knowing that you won’t judge them - those are the best kind of friends. They’re the kind of friends who make you more than the person you think you are, and who will inevitably be the ones who play important roles in your life. 

Of course, there are all kinds of mitigating circumstances. People have lives and they get busy, but when we’re adults it becomes stunningly obvious who’s willing to make time (even if it’s just an emoji-filled text message) in their lives and who’s there only when it’s convenient for them. We’re no longer thrown together by circumstance, so actions speak louder than words. I’m lucky I guess, in that the silence of many of my friendships reads well - it acts as the calm before the storm, and once it breaks we become the thunder and lightening that shakes the world. We might look like manic children (or teenaged Valley Girls) to some, but I guess that's just our version of jumping on cars!

images from Tumblr; video from YouTube

Oh, the Times: 2016 Styleboard

*all images from Tumblr, all videos from  YouTube

John: a Sunday Shoe Story

Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. 

There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. 

But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous.

~ Carrie Bradshaw, Sex & the City: An American Girl in Paris, Part Deux

featuring Madden Girl by Steve Madden pumps

Romance Intolerance

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I’m not a big fan of all that lovey-dovey crap that other people call romance. I’m the girl who hates getting flowers, would be more concerned about the poor guy’s ruined pants when he gets down on one knee, will think of WWI/II when people say V-Day, and (honest to Chanel) told her boyfriend that she didn’t want to see him on Valentine’s Day. Oh, and did I mention that little love letter I set on fire last year? Yeah. It happenned.

My attitude towards romance hasn’t really changed over the years, but lately I’ve been questioning why exactly I feel this way.  Most people assume that I can’t stand romance because I’m bitter, I’ve never had someone love me that way, I choose the wrong men, etc. Sure that could be a reason, but I don’t think it’s that easy. Even though my romantic endeavors have all gone down in flames, I still have examples of unconditionally loving relationships in my life. My parents’ relationship is the big example, and I feel like their attitude towards love is what I base mine off of. They love eachother, but there’s no drama – whether good or bad.

Their realistic relationship prides routine (like customized anniversary dragons) over extravagance (like weekly romantic dinners out). They do get annoyed with eachother (like the time my mother made homebaked croutons, and my father announced that he didn’t like croutons), but they bypass all the drama with stability. Even their wedding was no nonsense: they signed the papers at the house we still live in, with only their closest friends in attendance and a potluck dinner to celebrate. And our first dog was the bridesmaid. Yet, they're the ones who have stayed together forever while others get divorced. 

So, when it comes down to it, is it a bad thing that I don’t believe in all the extraneous baggage and drama that comes with a relationship? Afterall, when you’re done playing the dating game…

image from Tumblr. 

Yellow Shorts Off: a Shoe Sunday Story

It's no secret that I love me some yellow shorts. I had this obsession way before I saw the infamous Sex & the City episode, but seeing Carrie Bradshaw rock them just made me want them more. Thus far I have a pair of perfect yellow shorts by Volcom, and trust me when I say it, I'll be wearing them lots this summer. Knowing me, I won't wait til it's actually warm enough, but whatever, I do what I want!

Yellow Shorts Off by riella03 featuring stella mccartney

A Woman's Right to Shoes

Every time I buy another pair of shoes (approximately every 3 weeks based on the number of shoes I acquired last year, divided by the amount of weeks per year) I inevitably have to answer the question “why do you need so many shoes?” My answer is simple, and hasn’t really changed since I started buying shoes en masse in grade 12: because I can. I’ve given up justifying to people my shoe addiction because I don’t feel that I should have to. Yes, I admit it is an addiction – Hi, my name is Riella, and I’m a shoe addict – but I’m totally okay with it. If I’m okay with it, then you should be okay with it. I haven’t given up my shoes yet, even though I had to pay quite a bit of money to ship them across the country when I moved, so don’t ever expect me to give them up! So learn to love it, or leave it alone, because I sure won’t leave my babies!

Shoes: Aldo "Starace" platform heels

Shirt: Pure Design

Capris: Jacob Connexion

Bracelet: vintage false-pearl necklace

Computer: Apple MacBook

Sexy & the City

I can’t even form the words to gush about how much I love “Sexy and the City” by China Glaze. It is nail polish perfection, and oh so deserving of its title! Sparkle on ladies!

Fashion & the City

The leading ladies from Sex and the City are all known for their distinctive style, so this week is a nod to their unique fabulousness! Which of the girls are you? I'm mostly Miranda (sarcasm, etc), but I have quite a bit of Carrie as well (no one else would have the ridiculous amount of shoes as she and I do)! For the item details check out my Polyvore account.

Charlotte York by riella03 featuring a cashmere cardigan

Samantha Jones by riella03 featuring a biker jacket

Carrie Bradshaw by riella03 featuring christian dior handbags

Miranda Hobbes by riella03 featuring flat front pants