Tuesday, 12 April 2011

A Farewell to Hell on Earth

To anyone who knows anything about working where I work (Value Village), they know that it literally was, Hell on Earth. Thankfully enough, I have escaped my tortured existence there, so it’s time to say a not so fond farewell. What made the workplace so intolerable wasn’t the job itself, or the hours, or the co-workers (though obviously some improvement could be made on all fronts). It was in fact the customers who made this place the bane of my existence, and a daily trial by fire. But we’ve already had a rant about how much customers suck (two actually...), so we’re going to aim for something a little bit different today. We’re going to reveal all the things I’ve said to customers that haven’t been exactly “nice,” and even more juicy, the things that I wished I had said to customers. Ironically the things I’ve actually said have been pretty gutsy… Which is why I’ve gotten into a decent amount of trouble over my “attitude at work.” HA. Obviously I have attitude bitches!

Mean Things I’ve Said to Customers…

“Just back off.”
“You’re being really rude right now.”
“No, you actually DO have to hang the clothes up,  or you will be asked to leave the fitting rooms.”
“Well obviously you can’t [read], because you can’t seem to follow a simple instruction.” (in reference to the sign at the fitting rooms which read “Please Hang All Unwanted Items Here”).
“The sign right there says that it actually ISN’T my job.” (once again, to the fitting room sign to hang up your stuff).
“Have you SEEN some of the people who shop here?”
“All hardcover fiction is $3.99.” (when asked how much Bibles cost).
“You can’t talk to me that way.”
“It says right on the door that it’s the Special Needs fitting room, so you can’t use it.”
“Well, you’re obviously not listening, since I told you three times which fitting room to go in to.”
“Actually, that isn’t my job.”
“No, you can’t have your items wrapped in plastic bags. That’s wasteful. You can have newspaper.”
“It’s against company policy for cashiers to fold clothes. If we fold the clothes, then people think that they are washed, and they are definitely not.”

Mean Things I Wished I had Said…

“The door is right there; feel free to use it.”
“Not being able to read isn’t considered a handicap worthy of using the Special Needs fitting room. Neither is stupidity or laziness”
“Has anyone ever told you to go fuck yourself? Well, I guess there’s a first time for everything!”
“They don’t pay me enough to care/smile.”

God, I love being such a bitch sometimes :) This is by no means a complete and extensive list of the things I've said to customers, but it's all I could remember while I was writing. I'm sure I've said much meaner things, and thought much worse, but this is all you're going to get for now. Have you ever said something on a less than nice note to a customer? Now is the time to confess, since obviously I won't judge you :)

Farewell Value Village, we had some good times, but I’m definitely better off without you in my life!

Only one week left to enter the giveaway kids! Don't forget, or you'll miss out on your chance to win!


  1. This farewell post was very much anticipated, and thoroughly enjoyed >:D
    You will be missed Jaimie! I'll try to be a little more bitchy in your memory.

  2. thanks jasmine <3 we'll have to figure out a way to keep your bitch training going when i'm not there :)